For about 988 days I put way too much emphasis on obtaining my 10,000 step a day goal. How do I know this? I am feeling rather broken now that I have lost the streak. It started when I went from trying to obtain 10,000 steps a day to accidentally realizing that I had done it for a week or so to molding my life around getting that step count in. It lasted over two and half years and I’m lost.
I’m also realizing that this obsession I had with the step goal might be why I have found less and less joy in going outside for walks. It has become all about the number and not about the experience. I’m taking a step back, so to speak, to think about the reasons I let myself get to this point and to rethink my goals.
Pacing around the house to reach the goal did just that, it allowed me to reach the goal. It wasn’t a way to be happy while reaching the goal. The goal had become work. And not good work. I had been considering ending the streak, but I wasn’t ready to. I know I wasn’t ready by the way I feel today, the day after. I’m trying really hard to look at the positives and they are starting to show themselves.
Last night while attempting to reach that goal my foot started to hurt. I kept walking, even jogging some to try to get there. I’m not an athlete trying to win a medal, I should have stopped. This week I will do my best to recover from the psychological crap I have been putting myself through because of this goal. I want to focus on self care in a more positive way. The end goal shouldn’t be the amount of steps, it should be how healthy I am feeling and how happy I am to get there.
All this said, I tend to do well with having daily goals to obtain. That is one of the things I have learned about myself. In this case, I believe, I let the goal be more important than the journey to get there.
